Whether a job, customer or relationship…rejection sucks.
Technically the more you deal with rejection, the stronger you become can be true, early on it just plain stings. Some describe it as a numbness, disbelief or in a daze. No matter how you slice it, it’s painful.
I’m not calling myself an expert when it comes to rejection (that’s a bad look anyway right?), but I do know there are two areas you have to address quickly: ego and focus.
First, ego. Ever watch reality TV? Even though it’s not reality, emotion is normally driven by ego (hence good TV). Feelings are hard to fake (unless you’re a Kardashian) and rejection hits your ego like a mack truck. In a competition, losing and winning affects the ego greatly. For an example, when a contestant on a reality TV show doesn’t win, it’s more about the embarrassment and how it makes you feel than actually losing itself. In order to move on from rejection, you must separate ego from the task at hand plus the overall big picture.
Second, focus. If I told you to drive on the freeway only looking in your rear view mirror would you do it? (If you answered yes, please get some help!) That analogy is similar to what we do after being rejected. We look at the past instead of focus on the future. Now as hard as that sounds, let me share why this is one of the reasons I became a coach. Life happens and when it does, it doesn’t always fall in our favor. This is where choice comes in. You can choose to dwell in the past or look forward to the future. Sure, you can learn from your mistakes, but stay in the past too long and you’ll become stifled. Regardless the cause of the rejection, the best thing you can do is forget it happened and move on. Using a relationship as an example, the best advice I ever got and followed is excommunicate your ex for a while to advance the healing process. Sounds cold, but it works.
Rejection is a tough subject, but something we all deal with. The better equipped you are, the faster you can bounce back. Don’t worry if you don’t have tough skin, you can still apply these tactics.
Ready. Set. Move On!